"Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are." Chinese proverb

So often, I feel a painful tension in my shoulders, a hardness in my jaw, and a clenching in my stomach. Until recently, I would have said that I don't know where all this tension comes from. I have so much to be happy about, so much to be grateful for. Why is it that most of the time I feel tense, and I find myself fighting against reality?

Lately, I have realised what that fight is about. It is about disbelief. Despite the Spring's great insight, I still don't quite believe that I am good enough. I don't believe that I'm spiritually mature enough to be a priestess, that I'm good enough at my job, or that I'm generous enough to be a good friend. I just don't quite believe it. So I am constantly guarding myself against the moment that I am found out, and constantly striving to be different. Hence all that tension, trying to be who I think I should be. Trying to solve the problem of not being good enough.

In order to live the life I dream of, I don't need to change myself. All I need to do is love myself, accept all of who I am, be gentle with my own vulnerable soul. When I no longer reject aspects of myself but hold them gently, like a loving mother would, I can relax. When I tell myself that there is no need to be afraid, when I gently hold myself, I can feel the tension drain away.

Without all that tension, who I am feels much larger. When I relax, my heart opens to embrace the world, with its beauty and its pain. I feel the joy of living. I become who I am.

All it needs is giving to myself the gentleness and love I would give to anyone else.

With thanks to Oriah for posting the quote above on her Facebook page.